Saturday, 7 March 2009

The tallest ever man?

A discussion today has thrown up the incredible revelation that revered cricket commentator Jonathan Agnew is an incredible 1 mile tall*. This has raised a number of questions about how he goes about daily life, not least the (seemingly ordinary and mundane to us 'shorties') task of sitting down. Well, I can happily reveal the answer. Aggers (as he is known to loyal listeners of Test Match Special, which has nothing to do with ascertaining the best small incendiary device) has 250 hinged joints in his legs, which all collapse in beautiful symphony, allowing him to harmlessly, and effortlessly, glide down to seathood. Having done this, he can purr out the cricket news for hours on end. The small problem of standing up again is equally effortless, as numerous pneumatic devices extend the joints, and Aggers can rise proud into the evening air, the last rays of the setting sun setting him off a treat.

There, you've just learnt something new today.

* estimated height, based on a comparison to Ronnie Corbett.

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